pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
