4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
