So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I stole a fireplace last night.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
