whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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