I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
