Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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