Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
