3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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