he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
