I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
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