I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Randomize
