I hate your face
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
