He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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