What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Sorry about my life...
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
