i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
are you so shy because you have an std?
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Randomize
