She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize