I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
She even gives head with a lisp.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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