At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
bring money and cleavage
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
