is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
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