Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Randomize
