So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Randomize
