I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
