Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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