Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
