xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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