So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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