she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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