He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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