Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Randomize
