K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
