it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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