I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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