She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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