I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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