Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
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