we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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