If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
