Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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