Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
