remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
