But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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