I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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