this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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