i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize