remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I am never drinking with the goths again.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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