My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
