His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I understand Curling. That high.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
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