Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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