There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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