how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Randomize