just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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